Eww.. Constipation

I recently attended a talk conducted by Herbalife members. One of the testimonials that caught my attention is Herbalife helped to improve her constipation problem. Eww… Constipation! Don’t “eww..” before you read some jokes about constipation. LOLz - Laughing Out Loudz!

Terrible Constipation

A lady went to the doctor and complained that she had the most terrible constipation. The doctor examined her and then gave her a prescription for some tablets to be taken last thing at night. 2 weeks later the patient returned for a check-up and the doctor asked her how her constipation was. The doctor was rather surprised when the lady gloomily answered that the pills worked fine and that she went every morning at 8.00 am."So why the long face?" asked the doctor. "Because I don't get up until 8.30 am ! ! !" replied the patient.

Constipated

A man walks into his office and tells his best friend, mann... i'm constipated as hell, I think i'm gonna have to go to the hospital. His friend say’s ain’t that something you can buy from pharmacy like laxative? He say’s no man it’s to bad! So he goes to the hospital and the doctor say’s man you are full of shit, i'm gonna have to give you a suposatory! The man say’s what’s that? The doctor say’s it’s these pellets I have to stick up your ass. So the man say’s do what you gotta do doctor! So he has the man bend over the table and he shoves the suposatory up his ass. The man screams Oh! Shit! The doctor say’s take the rest of these and have your wife give them to you. So the man gets home and say’s, baby I need you to give me these suposatories. I’ll bend over and you stick one up my ass. So he bends over and she puts one hand on his shoulder and shoves it up his ass. He screams Oh! Shit! His wife say’s baby are you ok? He say’s, I just remembered the doctor had both hands on my shoulders!!!!!

Constipation

A man went to her doctor to see what could be done about his constipation.“It’s terrible,” he said, “I haven’t moved my bowels in a week.”“I see. Have you done anything about it?” asked the doctor.“Naturally,” he replied, “I sit in the bathroom for a half- hour in the morning and again at night.”“No,” the doctor said, “I mean do you take anything?”“Naturally,” he answered, “I take a magazine.”